The artwork in the framed print says, "Focus on the day, not the years!"

I guess for birthdays, that fits perfectly.

But in marriage, I think it's fitting to focus on the years!
We're celebrating a milestone for us, 30 years...

It's exactly one decade since our marriage appeared to be ending.
It seemed like I'd never ever trust again...

In those days, I had to focus on the day...just to stay in it!

But now, I do focus on the years, and it's a positive focus.  

The years of us working hard together to overcome the obstacles that came our way.  

The years that I wondered if I'd ever "cross over" to the other side and find my way back to love him like I'd loved him before the betrayal.

And yes, I did learn to trust him again - and honestly I questioned whether I ever could for many many years.   

I did learn to "cross over" to the other side and have found I love him more than I did yesterday.

We are driving off soon to St. Augustine, FL where we'll spend celebrating our milestone Anniversary...

We'll reconnect, and we'll celebrate the "Miracle" of God saving our marriage.

I always heard that a true marriage takes "3".

In our case, that rang true~

Thank you Lord for rescuing me, "us"...

and for giving us a marriage that beat all the odds...

It truly was all  because of "You"!

I continue to work hard after all these years just to "Stay in the Day"...

but now for different reasons~

Happy Anniversary to US!

~CC Catherine

Lil Doggies Have A Way of Reminding Me When To Be Grateful!

Some how a Dog's day is always great! These aren't my lil doggies, I actually took this picture in Memphis, TN in The Hard Rock Cafe Gift Shop where a lady was making a purchase. They were in her cloth purse together; yes together. They were just hangin out being cool and happy.

They're both little dachshunds, even though the one on the left seemed to remind me more of another breed...but, nonetheless...they were happy! I don't think I've ever saw a sad doggie...

I know I have so much to be thankful for......why can't I be happy like these lil doggies everyday, 24/7 like they are... All I can do is remind myself often to take life one day at a time... and enjoy each moment; as we never know when it can be taken from us, or who can be taken from us.

Thanks lil doggies for reminding me of this when I came across your lovely faces in my pics today! ;)

Staying in the Day thinking about choosing to be grateful more often! ~CC

Seven Years...God's Grace IS Awesome!

Happy Anniversary to Us! It's a bit after midnight, the day after January 18, our seven year anniversary of the day we had our miracle! The miracle was that I got my husband back, and I never knew I'd lost him...but I had. The Story, way too long to explain... but if you want to hear more, start by reading my Blog Archives from September of 2007.

Pic of my Beloved holding our new Granddaughter Cate on 12/18

This blog actually started as a result of our journey...I wanted to encourage other women to move on in their lives with dignity, regardless if their marriages weathered the storm or not. I wanted to offer a place where they could find someone that maybe was a little bit further in her journey of marital recovery so they could see that it's possible time "can" heal broken hearts.

It seemed I was meeting so many women with torn relationships, separated or divorced...it seemed easier to send them to this blog to hear my own story...and I could do what I try to do more in my life now...focus on the "now" and Stay In The Day with them...encourage them! My story is an important part of my life, it made me realize how precious my Beloved is...and how quickly I nearly lost him. It made me realize that he wasn't the only one that needed to change, I learned I did too. I feel blessed that our family survived the war...but it wasn't easy.

My husband dedicated himself to much counseling, I followed......we worked hard, and still do to learn all we can about each other. We never stopped loving each other, yet our life was nearly stolen from us. I feel we experienced a miracle.....everyday I feel like this. None of this would have been possible if it were not for the Grace God gave us......and the constant helper that He is to us. I always wanted a blueprint of what our recovery would look like in the early years.....I now understand "God" just wanted me to lean on Him, trust Him, one day at a time... I'm getting better at that every day!

I'm trusting my husband again...and I'm trusting that even though there are no guarantees in life with the exception of the Lord never leaving me, we'll grow old together rocking away; just like we always said we would. Happy Anniversary to us! On July 4th we will celebrate 27 years of marriage, by God's Grace...

On a calendar that sits on my husbands desk that is in front of me now, it reads the following for 1/18: "A time to weep and a time to laugh, a time to mourn and a time to dance, a time to scatter stones and a time to gather them" (taken from Ecclesiastes 3) This seemed so fitting for our anniversary bible verse. We now laugh, we now dance, we now gather stones...

Staying In The Day with you... ~CC

~Focus on Today - Today is where you are, Stay In It and Fall Backwards...

Treat Yourself With Dignity - Eat Healthy!

Butter Bib Lettuce, Red Cabbage, Mango, Oven Roasted Walnuts, Blueberries,

Drizzle w/ Rasberry Vinigrette Salad Dressing Salad

Last evening my husband had an "A'ha" moment. He was bringing me a cup of hot tea. As he walked into the family room, he was reminded of a tracing of my hand print I had made for him over 6 years ago. Around the outside of the handprint I'd copied an old poem I had written for him when we fell in love over 27 years ago. As he recalled this memory, he had a sweet smile on his face. I reminded him, lovingly, "That's the poem I sent to you six years ago when you weren't well, right before your call to me the following week". The call I was referring to was when he told me he would not be coming home, and that he was in a relationship with another woman.

He had totally misplaced in his memory why and when I'd given that to him. He only knew how much it had meant to him. Consequences of poor choices always have a way of creeping back into our memory. For me, that handprint and poem were a good memory. I felt God had inspired me to draw my handprint and copy that old poem around it, mail it next day air with a 13 page letter to remind him of my love and committment to him. At the time I thought he was nearing a nervous breakdown, but I had not a clue as to what was causing it. The memory for him when I shared why I had gave it to him brought sadness. Sadness on reflecting who he had become, and the pain that his sin had brought to me, our children, and himself.

We have rare flashbacks of those painful days, weeks, months, and early years when he came back to us. Fortunately for both of us, the counseling and support groups we joined in those early days of recovery continue to help us stay on the right track!

• We focus on the things we can change, not on the things we cannot; "the past".
• We live each day to the fullest and pray for God to guide us in each of our steps.
• We do our best to allow one another to sweep their own side of the street, we're still working on this one. This equates to not trying to control each other.
• We continue to strive for growth individually, both spiritually and emotionally.
• We realize that it's important to have accountability partners of the same sex, each of us. Marriage is work, regardless whether we are men and women of faith or not. By sharing our struggles with a "safe" friend that can pray with and for us, this helps us to stay on the right track.

  I leave you today with some food for thought:
• Never keep a secret to yourself of thoughts you're entertaining regarding an "emotional" connection to someone you know or have just met. Emotional connections are considered an emotional affair. When we are frustrated about where our marriage is, or what our marriage is not, it's very easy to fall into a trap of admiring someones kindness to you. This is definitely a baby step toward an affair beginning. Purchase the book, Torn Assunder, by Dave Carder if you relate to what I'm explaining here. Become Aware so you can "Beware" of what could ensnare you in this vulnerable time.
• Be appreciative that you are surviving one day at a time! Don't borrow what tomorrow holds, stay in today. Pray, read the word, (write it if you feel you are not remembering what you are reading, I did this) eat healthy, walk or exercise.
• Find a good marriage counselor & support group. We chose Christian counselors that were able to both speak to our spiritual and emotional needs. They were great!
• If you have children, get them into counseling; we did not do this. That was an oversight that we struggle sometimes to forgive ourselves for not doing. Sometimes we are so engrained in our own grief that we think that if our marriage makes it, that's all our children need. Children can be damaged in deep ways. They need to express their own emotions of the pain they are experiencing as they see their parents struggle to keep their marriage in tact. And they need to express them to a professional that can help them sort out their feelings to cope in a healthy way.
• Treat yourself with Dignity! Dignity for me was no longer trying to find out "who" she was. No more searching the web to find a phone number to call and dump my frustration and emotions out on her. No more trying to ask questions about how he had felt toward her. Dignity for me was to begin to hold my head high, and be good to myself. When I felt like I was being sucked back to that "victim" mentality, I had to purposefully choose the higher road.

  I pray you will choose the higher road too! Maybe you are just at the beginning of your journey, maybe you're like me and are years down the road in the recovery of your marriage. Maybe you are walking alone, and life is uncertain either way. Trust God! As painful as all your days can be at times, HE will bring you through them, one by one. I hung on to, and still do, my favorite bible verse, Proverbs 3: 5&6: 5. Lean on, trust in, and be confident in the Lord with all your heart and mind and do not rely on your own insight or understanding. 6. In all your ways know, recognize, and acknowledge Him, and He will direct and make straight and plain your paths.

  Staying In The Day along with you, ~CC
• PS: This post was originally written for an earlier post. I'm reposting again for the recipe I refer to on my other blog this week: http://catherinesteacups.blogspot.com/ I also wanted to say that tomorrow, 1/18/09, will be seven years since the phone call I refer to in the post. Early in my situation I wondered if I would ever get to a place of peace again in my marriage. I longed for a blueprint that would tell me when, and if, I'd ever regain it. I'm blessed to say that "today" I am experiencing that peace. Each day gets better...and I give God all the glory for bringing us "through" what was meant to destroy us! ~CC

©Sweet Memories...Become Jewels To Cherish

Eclectic Jewels Collectively Create Beauty...Just Like Sweet Memories

Precious Jewels Inspire Memories Of Past...

©Photography by ~CC

Yesterday I took my future daughter-in-law to a Christmas Open House at one of my favorite Antique Shops. Christmas music playing in the background; refreshments, punch, and even mulling spiced cider and chili were served. From the time we entered the shop, we felt elevated in to the Holiday Spirit! Walking from one vendors booth to another, it was as if going back in time. I told my son's fiancee that I felt like I was revisiting earlier days of my youth...and the things of old made me feel like I was having a visit with my Grandma.

As heavy as my heart had felt from having a house full of guests, I immediately felt a new sense of peace and ease in my day. My heart felt light and joy filled my soul. I was having a unique flash back to days when my Grandma took care of me.

Her name at birth was "Odessa Inez", her Daddy called her Dessie. My Grandfather decided when he married her that she should go by Inez, he thought it was a classy name. She lived till she was 92, passing away nearly five years ago come next February. I was privileged to know her for 46 years, and there was never a time I didn't cherish being in her presence.

In the antique shop I saw a silver Christmas tree. It was exactly like the one she started putting up in the late 60's. Then I began to see other items that I recalled her having in her home. The music of Nat King Cole played softly as I continued to be reminded of the precious Jewel I had, and still have, in my Grandma Inez. Whether in person, or in memory, being in her presence put a smile on my face and gave me peace in my heart.

Holidays can be a double edged sword to some when they've lost loved ones. Instead, I pray this holiday will serve to bring a precious Jewel back to your mind while preparing for this festive time of the year...and instead of sadness, I hope the memory will bring joy like mine did. I miss my Grandma fiercely...but I do have the hope of one day seeing her again in Heaven, I'm counting on it! She once told me that she was looking forward to her family reunion when it was her time to pass away... I will never forget her, and will also look forward to my own family reunion someday; when I can see her face to face.

If you visit any antique shops over this holiday, I encourage you to revisit earlier days you once enjoyed with a loved one too. What a gift from God to recapture a precious memory. What a gift to be transported from stress into peace just by enjoying a simple visit to a local shop and and being reminded of the love I have for my Grandma.

Staying In The Day with you...while remembering more"Sweet Memories" of old as I walk through this "Christ"mas season, ~CC

Friends, Tradition, and Tea For Every Day Of The Year!

"A cup that is already full cannot have more added to it. In order to receive the further good to which we are entitled, we must give of that which we have" ~Quote by Margaret Becker

I became a Tea Cup Collector nearly 15 or more years ago. Inspired by a mentor of mine, Devi Titus, when I attended a Baby Shower she was hosting for a friend from church. On the dining room table was the largest selection of tea cups I'd ever seen in my entire life, and uniquely...none matched! And that's exactly what I loved about the display, we all got to pick the one that fancied us the most.

Shortly thereafter, I walked into a Hallmark store and purchased my very first fine porcelain tea cup "Made in England", which would be come the first of one hundred plus in my collection I now have today. The cup in this photo was given to me from one of my best friends of nearly 20 years, Kathleen Ellis. Kathleen also began a collection shortly after I started mine. I'd say she may be catching up to the number I have in my own and hers are encased in the most beautiful Vintage Distressed Hutches; they are breathtaking!

Many a great conversation has been enjoyed over the sipping of tea from the cups in my collection. Some between two old friends, and some between groups of women enjoying a tea party to get acquainted with new neighbors over the years. Each time I move, I host a "Get Acquainted Tea" to get to know some of the women in my neighborhood. They are always a hit, and the women fall in love with the variety of scones I make, fresh lemon curd, my mock devonshire cream, and last but not least, the tea! I've even made some tremendous new Tea Bud's when hosting my Get Acquainted Teas, like Lya! Lya and I met in September of 2007, and we've been enjoying a monthly tea ever since. We rotate homes each month and we both look forward to the time together, conversation, and tea. We don't overwhelm ourselves with the refreshments and settle for a bit of sweetness, but enjoy multiple cups of the tea of the day!

On occasion, I've been inspired to share one of the cups from my collection with others that God leads into my life. There is no rhyme or reason, and I totally wait for the nudge from Him to give one away. In some cases, I've given the very first tea cup to start their own collection. In other cases, it's because I have wanted the person to always remember our tea times together no matter where life will lead them. One cup was shared with a friend that now lives in England, who would have guessed one of my cups would now reside so far away? We still stay in touch to this day and we often refer to the days in our correspondence of which we enjoyed our tea time together and the friendship we enjoyed and continue to do so.

Whether you have started your own tea cup collection or not, consider doing so. It's much fun, and many of the cups I've obtained are from vintage shops, consignment boutiques, gifts from family and friends once they knew I collected cups, and even yard sales. Tea Cups really are like friends, you never quite know when you're going to find a new one! Now, you say you don't drink tea? Well, I didn't either till right before I started my collection. Start with a mild black tea and add sugar if needed. My girlfriend Kathleen also swayed me into drinking milk in my tea, which I now nearly cannot live without.

Staying In The Day today with something Light Hearted for the Holidays! Fa la la la la! Celebrating the Birth of Jesus, as He IS the Reason for this Season! ~CC

©Thanksgiving......and Sticktoitiveness....

On the edge of where I took a seat...

©Photography by ~CC

There's been many times in my life that I didn't want to stick to something. There was the time when I was 10 and had been taking piano lessons for a year. When I was just beginning to get good and the practice required more of me utilizing my left hand, I quit. Then there was the time when I was a teenager and my school work required more of me to be among the A-Section (Academic) in my high school, I just did what came easy without much studying...and made great grades, but graduated among the B-Section (Business) peers instead of giving my best. Unfortunately I brought this same mentality into my 20's, 30's, and even my 40's. Finally, somewhere in my late 40's, I decided just getting by, wasn't enough. Phil: 3: 13 Brothers, I do not consider myself yet to have taken hold of it. But one thing I do: Forgetting what is behind and straining toward what is ahead, 14 I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus.

A few years back, I finally learned what Phil. 3: 13&14 meant. When my husband returned home nearly seven years ago, something inside wouldn't give up and move on like I would have in the past. There was this innate "Sticktoitiveness" that I couldn't explain. Somewhere inside of my heart I kept hearing whispers of words like, "It's going to be alright, don't give up". I spent much time in God's word back then, as each day was an overwhelming mountain for me and my husband in what became a huge walk in his recovery. Surprisingly to me, in my own recovery too. Then about two years ago, I took another role in my company. I had worked in the department for nearly five years at that time. Everyone felt I had the experience and knowledge of about all there was to know, I'd be a perfect fit with the new job. Well, needless to say, I felt very under qualified when I began the training and learned there were so many details I didn't know. All of a sudden, it was like I was 10 again, taking piano lessons and I wanted to quit. Something inside of me wouldn't let me. More little voices began to play in my head, "God wouldn't open a door for me if He hasn't equipped me, don't give up...don't give in, "Focus on Finishing Well". Fortunately, I listened to those voices in my head and I didn't give up. It took me five months to get to feeling "comfortable" again...but the long hard road was worth it.

The photo included in this blog posting is another photo taken on Veteran's Day in Tallulah Falls, GA. It was in the middle of a climb to get to the top of the mountain. It was the only place in the two mile hike that I thought I was going to have to give up. I turned around on the steps, sat down, and looked at this view. Something told me to take this picture...and now I know why. It's another example in my more recent years of where I put into practice, "Sticktoitiveness". I made it to the top of the mountain.......and if I hadn't, all the other lovely landscape of Fall Foliage would have been missed. I wouldn't have gotten to experience the Mountain Top experience with my husband and our buddy that was along. On Nov 11, ~CC accomplished another feat! Even though it may have been small in many's eyes, it was large in mine!

I like who I am today...who I've become anyways...because I'm a perfect example of how God changes someone through tragedy. I could have given up on my marriage in 2002, with God's help I didn't. I could have given up on the new role I took in my department two years ago, with God's help I didn't and I absolutely love what I do. And, on the first hike of my life I took in the gorgeous State Park of Tallulah Falls, GA, I didn't give up...and the reward was so awesome!

Whatever you're up against today, don't give up. "Sticktoitiveness" is quite rewarding, and it teaches us much about who we are, and who we've not yet become. Thankfully, God didn't give up on me...I'm sure He won't give up on you either!

Staying In The Day with you... ~CC

© If We Only Focus On Death, We May Not See All The Beauty That Lies Before Us

© Focusing Beyond Death...

© Photography by ~CC - Tallulah Falls, GA (please double click on the photograph so you can see an enlarged view to see the details of both Death and Beauty)

I had the privilege of enjoying Veteran's Day in the GA mountains with my husband and a friend yesterday. The location, Tallulah Falls, a vibrant State Park where we walked over two miles on a number of the trails, crossed over a bridge suspended over one of the falls and it was "breathtaking", to say the least. We walked so many steps that today I have found a new respect for what the calves in my legs felt like earlier this week.

This photo was one of the pics I snapped. I deliberately take photos that evoke deep thought, and this one was shouting out at me. Standing staunch and dark was death; the dead tree...and the vast array of beauty is seen surrounding it with the waterfalls and colorful foliage as it's back drop. This "freeze frame" reminded me of how easy it is for us to focus on the "death" in our lives at times, so much so that we miss the rest of the beauty that surrounds us. Whether it's the death of a dream, a friendship, a marriage, or a loved one; there is still much beauty that surrounds us; despite our deep loss. The key for us is to look for it, no matter how hard it might be.

Today my prayer is that you look for the beauty surrounding you. Maybe it's not a waterfall with fall leaves, instead maybe it's the smile of a baby sitting in front of you in church, or the sun setting on a cool winter evening as a wood burning stove is trailing in the distance. Regardless, there is beauty surrounding you; embrace it and use it as a stepping stone into tomorrow. Taking one day at a time, you can move forward.

Staying In The Day with you while choosing to focus on the beauty around me, ~CC

© Do we devote to "doing" versus how much time we give to "being"

Miracles of Reconciliation

©Photography by ~CC

Miracles of reconciliation are not complete when they occur, the work has only just begun. With God in control of our lives, he makes the impossible a reality. I believe our failures are allowed for us each to realize how imperfect we are on our own. It is only through "Him" that we truly succeed in the things or people we touch in this life. We can choose to "do" anything, but what if "He" calls us just to "be"? And if so, what would that look like?

It's been months since I've journaled on this blog, I have missed it! I have thought of you often, have written in my mind time after time, but only today I stopped "doing" and am just "being" here with you. Maybe it's all the pain I've witnessed these past weeks from the people I love the most; my family and our friends.

A friends loss of both parents this year, burying her mother as recent as two weeks ago. This same friend is experiencing another chance at love and finds herself newly engaged, a blessing at such a time of deep loss and pain in her life. Another testimony to life after divorce.

Another friend not even forty has been diagnosed with Melanoma Cancer on his ear lobe. He and his wife are leaning on God, family and friends for support.

Another friend is one of my largest fans of this blog, is getting another chance with reconciliation in her marriage. She was faithful to pray and believe that he would come home after many months of separation and anguish, and he did. My peer at work has a saying, "God is off the chain". I think I know what she means when I witness the victory of reconciliation.

Another set of friends are at the financial crossroads of ruin and do not know where their next roof over their head will be. I remember our family being there ourselves years ago, we walk with these friends and encourage them by sharing our life story; God will make a way, some how, some way...and they continue the fight.

And then there is the young family that was torn apart last year at this time from marital affairs, that now finds themselves in the rebuilding phase of their marriage. During that painful time the husband felt his life was heading in another direction. The wife, pregnant with their third child, refused to allow her love to die for this husband. Months later, and with much prayer, this husband returned home. The picture on this journal entry are the hands of this family; wife, husband, sons, and baby daughter. A "Miracle" of reconciliation....and they are working together to "stay together" one day at a time.

I am encouraged by the new chapters we all face in our lives after we walk through such pain. A young woman's life restored in every way after losing it all. Today she finds herself years later happily married, healthy, has a devoted husband, son, and a daughter on the way soon.

This morning as I was reading a great book called "The Good Life", by Chuck Colson, I was literally frozen when I read the following: (paraphrased) Thinking about his autistic grandsons schedule made him examine his own priorities. It made him think about the time he devoted to "doing" things- a lot of it simply indulging in distraction - versus how much time he gave to "being". Don't we all fall into that catagory at times? I identified with that statement, and I don't like it.

My prayer today for all of us is that we stop "doing"...and that we just simply "be" who it is today that God wants us to be. To sit quietly in a chair and read or pray. To hear our friend in need, to hug and comfort our neighbor that sits quietly alone; longing to have someone visit him or her. Let us be, just be........who God has intended us to be without the "doing".

I am reminded of the victory and healing that God brought to my own family nearly seven years ago. By all standards, our marriage and family were doomed in the worlds eyes, but not in God's. His desire was for us to take one day at a time, do the best we could to Stay In the Day, and live out the Victory He had given us, despite our own failures.

My goal remains to live out Psalm 147:11. "The Lord delights in those who fear him, who put their hope in his unfailing love". Nehemiah 8:10, "The JOY of the Lord is your STRENGTH".

Stay In The Day........ Stop "doing" and just "be"! ~CC

© A Lost Art, Living From The Heart

© Photography by ~CC

~A Lost Art...The Pathway to Living From The Heart

Does distance make the heart grow fonder? I guess the answer to that depends on what we are distanced from. In my case with the absence of spending time this past month blogging, the answer is yes~ I've been away from blogging partly due to some writing assignments with N.E. Georgia Writers Club. So, I'm glad to be back! The writing assignments are done and submitted!

During my hiatus, I came across a small four inch spiraled notebook that I used in the early days of my journey in the restoration of my marriage and my life. It was nice to sit back and reconnect with who I was in those early days and understand how far I've come with the aid of a phenomenal God, tremendous support and guidance from qualified counselors, and the generosity of other women that have aided me in understanding that I've not walked this journey alone.

My purpose of the journal was to write daily in it before I began my day. Typically I would write before I even stepped foot out of bed. My challenge was to write and express who God was to me each day. I was also to explore and write about what God meant to me that specific day. I thought it might be interesting to share these with you. The things I wrote about is most likely where the threads of our tapestry in life are similar. We all are searching for more of God, and to learn the art of how to live more from the heart.

Journal Entry#1, July 27, 2002: Circumstances change, but God doesn't. Today He is waiting for me. He is patience to me today, so patient.

Journal Entry#2, July 28, 2002: Today God, my Heavenly Father is my only source for breath. He always has been I guess...Today I know it for sure.

Journal Entry#3, July 29, 2002: Today, my Heavenly Father is still my breath... I am no longer breathing, it is He who inhales and exhales; but it is still I who sighs. I don't want to sigh Father.

Journal Entry#4, October 26, 2002: Father God, Today you are my encourager - to get out of bed, to bathe, to think, to function. Where would I be without you?

Journal Entry#5, October 27, 2002: Lord God, Today you mean to me "My Tomorrow". I cannot think about anything but today, I can not~ You are my tomorrow, no matter what~ Life is not fair, but you are.

Journal Entry#6, October 29, 2002: Today God remains with me ---every moment of the day. I feel Him in me, around me, carrying me, I feel him everywhere. It's OK that I am tired. He will carry me; I don't have to do it on my own.

Journal Entry #7, November 3, 2002: Dear Lord, You have not changed ---ever! I only have lost my view from time to time. Today you are "Forever" to me! Forever, ~C

Today it rained here. The air always smells so great and fresh! It's always as if there is a sense of new beginnings to me after a rain. The sunshine comes out, the earth is inhaling the fresh air and the plants and trees around always appear greener. The rain has a great way of reminding us of what we can't live without.

Taking the time to read this journal again reminded me that God works the same way when we're faced with the struggles in our lives. He uses whatever He can in our lives to draw us closer to Him. The ultimate goal is for our hearts to be 100% connected to His~ How can we live from our hearts if we're not connected to Him, our source? I'm glad the journal entries refreshed my mind as to how my own journey of brokenness brought me closer to Him. The brokenness and tragedy was sometimes paralyzing to me. But in many ways, it was like the dreary rain over my life eventually brought forth greener pastures. Today, my life is much brighter. Today, I'm still searching to understand where God is leading me. More importantly, I'm working at living from the heart, it's truly ~HIS Art... Staying in the Day, ~C

~Wild About You... Meeting The Love Of My Life on Valentine's Day 27 Years Ago!

© Photography by ~CC

© Wild About You...

I so badly wanted to journal on ~Valentine's Day, but with the hustle and bustle of my work day and then whisking a special candle lit Valentine Dinner up for my husband, I didn't have time.

It is refreshing to experience, see, and taste what recovery from a broken marriage looks and feels like. Sitting in our dining room as a couple last evening, my husband said "Grace" for our meal. As he was praying, tears came to my eyes as I was reflecting on the "amazing journey" that God has brought us through these past six years. My heart was extremely thankful to the Lord for being with us in those early days of rebuilding our marriage. He helped us to stay strong and determined to walk through all the "hard stuff" like counseling, consequences, and taught us both how to deal with memories that didn't want to go away.

In the brief moment my husband prayed those words, I realized what a BLESSING and MIRACLE we've witnessed first hand. The more we focus on our "Today" and less on our yesterdays, the faster we continue to heal. The less we worry about our tomorrow and stay in "Today"...the faster we heal. The more we continue to give God control of our marriage...the more our love is rekindled.

Letting go of the need to control is an art! The more I let go of it, the more beautiful the picture of me becomes! I bought my husband the "Wild About You" pillow to celebrate his 40th birthday. It is placed on our bed daily as I toss my pillows to and fro. I am still "Wild About Him"!

Psalm 36:7How priceless is your unfailing love! Both high and low among men find refuge in the shadow of your wings.

Staying In The Day with you...and continuing to Celebrate my Marriage! ~CC

"Thanksgiving"...So many things to be thankful for...how do I remain true to myself and what I'm feeling, but still remain thankful?

1. When I hear the word "Thanksgiving", I automatically find myself migrating to thoughts of family, health, and the freedom we have in the United States. My husband & I experienced a lovely trip north by auto this past week where I captured this photo from the car. As we drove by this flag flying near a business, I grabbed my camera quickly and fortunately the moving snap turned out exactly as I'd hoped it would.

We are still experiencing the awesome visit with family and friends. The "present" has a way of revisiting earlier days when the laughter begins to seep from the walls of the room while the stories unfold. It was evident that we all just felt so happy listening to my husband and his childhood friends that he spent most of his childhood days with sharing the fond stories of days gone by. It's so awesome to visit a part of my husband's childhood by listening to the crowd tell their versions of the same stories he's often shared with me. Their excitement is just as deep as his has always been. These men become little boys again as they reach back in time to reconnect, laugh, and still love like brothers. Hugs and "I love you's" permeate the room as they leave the home. "Call me next year, we'll come again!" is the resounding comment as they exit the front door...and we hope and pray for another fond reunion such as this. This is "Thanksgiving".

The traditional phone greetings from our children that aren't with us, the well wishes that we will have a great Thanksgiving Day with our time here in CT. This is "Thanksgiving". We sit down to our Turkey Dinner that my mother-in-law and I have slaved over, this is "Thanksgiving". We ate till we couldn't eat any more, and I fell asleep at 7pm, this is "Thanksgiving". Well, it's what we "know" Thanksgiving to be, right? The smell of the turkey, the great stuffing, the desserts...it's what we have experienced and has become tradition for most of us.

Thanksgiving = To be thankful for something. To "Give" something back since we've been so blessed. "CC's" interpretation of what defines "Thanksgiving".

No matter what life has unfolded to us, we still have so much to be thankful for. I think the hardest thing for all of us... is how we struggle to "learn" to find a "healthy" balance of allowing ourselves to be true to our "emotions" in whatever we are going through in life. We need to allow ourselves the "privilege" of grieving our losses, whatever they may be. But, not allowing those losses to take us as captors and identify us for the rest of our lives. There is a favorite scripture my Great Grandmother loved that seems to fit what I'm trying to share...

Ecclesiastes 3: 1, 4 "There is a right time for everything...a time to cry, a time to laugh, a time to grieve, a time to dance."

Scripture gives us the "right" perspective. Life goes on...and we must search within ourselves and ask the Lord to "help" us to let go of the things that maybe we've held on too tightly that has kept us as captors of our past painful events; whether divorce, death, or betrayal. I remember when my Dad passed away that I felt if I ever laughed again, it would somehow dishonor him. How could I ever be "OK" with laughter again...my Dad had died. I felt the same way when my 27 year old brother was tragically killed 27 years ago. For much of my inner spirit, I held on to the pain, and I kept the darkness and sadness inside because I thought I "ought" to...in order to honor them. How interesting that we find ourselves over the years adapting to this type of "coping" skill, these "unwritten" codes that we live by.

I'm grateful that through much prayer, love, and counseling, I've been set "FREE" from these old coping mechanisms that I had lived most of my life with. And, because I'm now "aware" of how I'm wired, I can detect when I begin to regress and return to my "old" way of thinking. I have to remind myself of the scripture I shared in today's blog. There is time to cry, to laugh, to grieve, to dance...and to GIVE THANKS! May today we all find something to GIVE, even if just a smile to a stranger.

Staying in the Day...and remaining Thankful with YOU! ~CC